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Of You


Do not, I beg, you look at me.

Do not even STARE.

Of you I shall not utter,

Not ONE, a solemn dare.


Of you I shall not write about,

Of you, of whom I care.

Of you I try to think aloud

In quiet abyss stare.


Of you did countless nights go by

From whence my future waning;

Of you did stars refuse to shine,

For I’d detest their glory.


Of you, a love not known to last,

Dither WHERE I’m at.

Of you my heart doth beats a lot;

BUT I shan’t heed nor hearken.


This odd non-oath, not sworn nor spoken,

Of you, for which, such is forgotten,

It speaks to me in tell-tale mystery

A song in which a certain misery.


For there, a kingdom long forgotten,

Reigned no servant to mortal infatuation;

Lest the mortal reigned,

And lest a mortal heart was queen!

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A Dream

How are you?

This is a question. This is the question.

How. Are. You.
How have you been? The years pass on, and I, my own, is a lost dream.
Good morning. Good evening. Good riddance. Good bye.
I hoped to fake a lie, and complicate the already complicated.
You were a dream I had. A fantasy in writing. A fiction from a novel. A neverending pause.

How real is a dream, and how vivid can it be? It was there, and it was not;

And we were here but now we’re not.
And how are you, my friend? How I’ve longed to know.
The words we left unspoken brought tears that were forgotten. Yet the answer did lie in what was written – an archived crusade that rotted.
My! The years passed. The shame once cruel to one, yet today, a single question, a single thought – a memory and a clause.
It is our story left unwritten…

For which sake the past forgiven.
And I think, and I wonder, and I know now what a blunder

If I had let it tarry on whilst knowing me, and knowing you.
You can’t, i say, you can’t.

And I? I shan’t forget.
I write this here today in memory. The memory of a dream.

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In My Search for Truth, I Learned of Ang Dating Daan and Bro. Eli, and Everything Changes

 “The Old Path.”
 
I remember the days of my youth where I first heard of it. I remember the voice of conviction in the man, Bro. Eli Soriano, who spoke. He spoke of things unknown to me, yet familiar. I believe I thought it right to repel, to find it at the very least distasteful to listen.
 
In 2006, Bro. Eli was a household name and the program “Ang Dating Daan” was popular (until these days). I would hear his preaching, and then hear much about him, but I never bothered to actually listen.
 
During the time, the idea of shifting away from my Catholic belief seemed an impossible feat.
 
I was devoutly Catholic. I even memorized many Catholic prayers in my lifetime and knew by heart many of the doctrines of this church, which I revered then as the true religion of the world.
 
Little did I know the time would come, that through the program “Ang Dating Daan” (‘The Old Path‘ in English), I will veer away from the faith that I learned to accept blindly since birth – the faith I had readily perceived to die with.
 
That was until I actually listened.
 
To Bro. Eli.
 
Through Ang Dating Daan.
 

 
“The Old Path” started radio broadcasts in 1980 as a three-person production team. Bro. Eli, encouraged by his nephew and now veteran broadcast journalist Kuya Daniel Razon, went on to preach on television starting in 1983. Later on, ‘Biblia Ang Sasagot: Itanong Mo Kay Soriano’ worked its way as the programs best segment.
 
 

“I may be mocked, abused, accused, and denied. But given the chance to live again, I will choose this life for I am loved by my God!”

– Bro. Eli Soriano on Twitter, February 4, 2010

 
 
Then, it was in the late 2000s that Ang Dating Daan received huge backlash, as Bro. Eli was attacked personally by another religious group. The actions of the Iglesia ni Cristo (INC), founded by Felix Manalo, taken against Bro. Eli reached impeccable heights, storming the news media with fallacies – stories that even I believed.
 
It was not until I was in college that I slowly opened my heart to the teachings of Bro. Eli on UNTV Public Service Channel. Later on, I would resolve to listen to the indoctrinations offered at the Members Church Of God International’s congregational locales.
 
Bro. Eli was out-of-country, when charges were re-opened against him. The Iglesia Ni Cristo made many false accusations against him, and drove the lone televangelist to stay away from the country. It was then that Bro. Eli had realized the God-given opportunity for him to preach salvation to other nations.
 

 
 
Like the many, I have been tricked to loathe this preacher and the program which did nothing but good to others. I was wrong – terribly wrong indeed. Ang Dating Daan has been devoted to many advocacies and charities in line with Bro. Eli’s motto, “Walang gawang mabuti ang magbubunga ng masama. (Good deeds can reap no evil.)”
 
I would be remiss to not mention the advocacies started through Ang Dating Daan, with the leadership of Bro. Eli and Bro. Daniel Razon.
 
Only last year, during the 35th Anniversary of Ang Dating Daan, 1,700 PWD (Persons with Disabilities) and charities received a night to remember, witnessing the ‘Ang Dating Daan Chorale’ sing praises to God, and receiving donations of 100,000php each.
 
The Medical Missions and socio-civic activities of UNTV are well-supported by Ang Dating Daan. As a volunteer nurse with Clinic ni Kuya Medical Mission in Cavite, I can very well say this.
 
 
“The Old Path.”
 
The program celebrates 36 years of continuous and fruitful broadcast. Celebrating the Anniversary at the Mall Of Asia Arena on December 9, we invite you to listen to the Live Bible Exposition.
 
I am humbled for the blessings of being able to know the Church that I am now a part of. Listening to the program and Bible Expositions, I found my way.
 
And now I share this to all. Be willing to listen. I dare you to take this journey –
 
A definitely worthwhile journey through The Old Path.
 
 

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Kuya Daniel: A True Friend and Big Brother to All

Kuya.

It is a title that resounds. A title that befits him for his kindness and generosity.

Mr. Public Service: a friend, and brother.

Is he not but one man?

Reflecting upon his numerous achievements and noble works in broadcasting and numerous others in public service, one can say that such feats are but impossible to achieve by a single person.

But Kuya Daniel Razon has done through God’s help these amazing works, showing once again what pure motive to serve God can do – exceeding the ordinary, even the wildest expectations anyone can set.

(Photo from Daniel Razon Official Facebook Page)

In the thirty-three years that he had committed to serve God and his fellowmen, Kuya Daniel Razon has alit a candle, the light of which brought forth causes that benefit many people.

What would modern journalism be like without UNTV News And Rescue, which tweaked mainstream practice focused on being first? This news-and-rescue advocacy prioritizes saving lives of others at the expense of breaking news first.

Or where would some thousand deserving yet poor students be now without the chance to get enrolled at  La Verdad Christian College? The tuition-free education program is one of the country’s first that have yielded thousands of graduates and now socially-useful citizens of the country.

Moreover, many of residents from various urban barangays and provincial areas are satisfied beneficiaries of his People’s Day Medical Mission outreaches, not the least those who avail the free services of Clinic Ni Kuya, Legal Center ni Kuya and Botika ni Kuya, among others.

As a nurse, the works of this man we call simply as Kuya Daniel is truly an inspiration. Like the thousands of lives changed through his works, inspirational speeches and sermons before the congregants of the Members Church of God International (MCGI), my life’s been changed and improved each day by big brother.

What encouraged me to pursue nursing as a professional career was the beauty of its nobility: spending a very fulfilling life serving others. Thankfully to God, I had been given the chance to become a volunteer staff of Clinic ni Kuya (CNK) Medical Mission in Cavite.

This opportunity gave me a grasp of Kuya Daniel’s genuine commitment to a lifelong advocacy. As a weekly regular volunteer with Clinic ni Kuya, we catered to hundreds of patients every week for free, including medication and follow-ups.

Many look up to him, and many should.

(Photo from Daniel Razon Official Facebook Page)

In line with advocacies that are truly patriotic, committed to nation-building and life changing, my admiration of Kuya Daniel’s bold ambition has given me a rich well of inspiration to do good despite the odds – because as Kuya Daniel always utter: doing good will reap no evil in due time.

Many look up to him, and many should.

So I take this opportunity to tell my fellow youth, let us walk in his example.

Of course, it cannot be expected of many of us to institute Transient Homes like the one Kuya Daniel Razon has helped put up in  Quezon City, which is the first of its kind in the Philippines, nor put up an all-expense-paid school like the La Verdad Christian College.

But what can be expected of us is to devote our works to things that are not futile – to things that are of greater cause.

 

Mr. Public Service Kuya Daniel Razon has a name that is not simply words. He is an elder brother, a teacher, a father, and even a friend to those in need.

For a man of true valor – kind and God-fearing, we are thankful forever to God. Happy 33 Years of Service to God and Humanity, Kuya Daniel Razon!

 

To God be the Glory!

 

 

 

 

 

2

Excerpts of Life: Understand

How I do not understand life:

How we can be sad

And then happy,

And then sad again.

How I do not understand love:

You give and give

And sometimes get nothing back,

But that’s still alright.

How I do not understand grief;

Nor anger

Or fear,

Or sadness through joy.

How I don’t understand

What I do understand

About not understanding

Since the world still revolves.

And I do not understand why I’m here.

All I know Is I have a goal;

And I don’t understand this fear,

But I know that God has a purpose.

And somehow

I’m no longer ‘fraid,

Or frustrated,

Not even pained.

For despite

That somehow I walk blindly;

I walk in fear

Of the Lord;

That He holds my hand

Ever so kindly

So I know that

I’m never alone.

(“Understand” written on Oct. 20, 2016)
Photo taken from SUNRISE WALLPAPERS on Google Play.

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Anew

Anew,

I knew

What I wanted

To do.
And I think

As I blink

It’s not what’s

Known to you.
I laughed

until I cried;

And well,

I could abide.
It’s too early:

Momentary,

Sedentary.

That’s life only.
And if I wait

upon the stars,

Upon the dictate

of my heart,
In time I know

I’ll see the stars,

In moments up

Above the wars.
Just believe anew,

The Lord shall see you through.

Find the heart that lives

In things that shall abide.
(“Anew” 10/14/16)

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Blank

This is a blank space.

 

I have just written “This is a blank space.” on the blank space.

Now, the blank space is no more.

 

Where is the border of your gate from the sidewalk?

And how do you know which part of the border is still yours?

Until exactly which part of the face is still called “chin”?

And at what angle in the horizon can we tell that the sun has begun to set?

 

If forty-nine people out of fifty got question A correctly,

Is that credible proof that the one in fifty is mentally-challenged?

How about if the same one in the fifty got the rest of the hundred questions correctly

And the other forty-nine got them wrong?

 

These are silly questions,

And I am a sad woman

Testing the limits of an unrequited love

Thinking till I cry, crying till I sleep.

 

How does one man know that they’ve got their stuff together?

How do they not know that it has just not arrived yet?

Do I know that it can and will arrive soon?

Well, damn.

 

I used to think I could write like the gods.

I used to have luck on my side.

I used to love how things just worked out for me.

I prided myself of my best and my complacency.

 

There is a mystery about the world –

How one can slump so low from a pedestal so high

And never even see it coming.

Who put people on that pedestal that sometimes one didn’t know how high above one stood?

 

And there is a mystery about people –

Like ruthlessness behind the sweetest of smiles

Or history behind an innocent face.

What made pedestals too high to hike and built craters too deep to climb out of?

 

What does it mean? What should it mean?

Three years tomorrow – I am thankful.

Three years gone by – I’m hopeful.

Three years. Three.

 

And I’ve watched my life go by,

And I’ve seen other lives go,

And I’ve known and not known things,

And I’ve had to forget things.

 

This blank space is filled now.

Surely, I should sleep now.

But what of tomorrow? How?

I can’t be sad, but I can’t be happy either.

 

This was a blank space.

Now that I have written on the blank space,

I can start again on another blank space

For this blank space is done.

 

But just because I’ve put it away doesn’t mean it wasn’t there.

Just because it’s in the past doesn’t mean it won’t matter.

Just because it doesn’t matter doesn’t mean it doesn’t hurt.

It does. It does.

 

Just when I thought one thing, something else comes around.

Even when we anticipate consequences, we still fall in love.

Even when we prepare for it, we can still be unprepared.

My heart aches, this space is full, but my thoughts are blank.